After working with divorcing couples for over 20 years, I am turning my attention to working with couples who are not divorcing — but who have disagreements about finances.
“Couples may be tempted to just keep limping along, but studies show that oftentimes relationships end because of disagreements over money.”
Finances are a common source of conflict in relationships. Trying to work through the conflict alone can be difficult and unproductive. Couples may be tempted to just keep limping along, but studies show that oftentimes relationships end because of disagreements over money. As a licensed Financial Therapist, I can help.
Through a series of steps, we will work together to learn about your individual relationships with money and your relationship as a couple with money. While each couple is unique, the following is a general outline of the steps to go through:
Getting to Know You
I will be asking you, individually, about your finances in an effort to assess your familiarity with your finances. Knowledge is the key to being able to make decisions. Is there a need to do some one-on-one education to balance the breadth of financial knowledge? While the goal isn’t to make you a financial expert, there are some basics that one would need to know before doing further work.
I’ll learn about your views about money and will help you identify your money personality. Our views about money may be shaped by our families, our experiences, our communities, etc. We may rely on our views about money to assist us in decision-making.
Learning about your conflict style and coping is important too. How do you navigate and resolve issues not related to money?
The environment in which difficult conversations occur plays a significant influence on the success or failure of resolving issues. We will work on healthy communication skills to provide you with a safe environment that allows for free expression and understanding.
Identifying the Issue(s)
I’ll explore those financial topics that have led to money arguments. The “issue” isn’t what the other person is or is not doing. We will identify the specific problem causing the money issue. You may both agree on a particular money issue or you may each have your own idea as to differing money issues.
We will do a brainstorming session in which all ideas are generated without evaluation. It is everyone’s responsibility to contribute to the list of possible options for each issue.
The resolution reached should be one that meets the approval of both individuals. Before we reach a resolution, we will first establish objective criteria that a final resolution should address.
If you would like further information, please schedule a free ½ hour (30 minute) consultation to discuss how I may be of help with your money talks. Contact me today to learn more!